Put The Phone Down…!

I’ve never been technology minded.  As long as the computer does what I want it to do I’m happy, which is usually nothing more than to let me email, surf the net and word process… anything else and I’m flumoxed.  And yes, I’m the same when it comes to mobiles; fancy applications for this, that and the other are wasted on me – all I want to do is make a call or send a text.

My other half, however, loves his smartphone.  Not that he’s an expert, but what he lacks in knowledge he certainly makes up for in enthusiasm.

At first, it was the quality of the photos he could take that excited him, but then he discovered downloadable apps.  This is when he realised not only could he take pictures, he could also create pictorial collages and despite being no David Bailey he set about putting quite a few compositions together.  From dogs, to our children, to me, can you believe?  And rather proud of his achievements, he insisted I view each and every single one of them. However, there are only so many images of the family pet a woman can look at before they all start to get a bit samey… and not being the best model in the world, I struggle to see anything positive in individual pictures of myself, let alone having loads of them staring back at me, all at the same time! 

But like any caring wife, I simply smiled politely and told him how wonderful his creations were… Big Mistake!

Because that’s when he decided to take his new found talent one step further – now moving on to producing slide shows with these rather dodgy photos; slide shows that came with music!  Oh yes, he went from collage to montage… his snapshots now fading in and out with some sentimental tune playing in the background, themed special effects included as standard.

Much to my frustration, I again became one of his favourite subjects, but before you all go thinking I’m just being mean, have you ever tried emailing these things?  No…? Well let me tell you my other half has and they take absolutely forever to attach.  But guess what, growing ever more confident in his technology skills Robert found a much quicker way to enable me to enjoy his latest photographic conceptions… By uploading the damn things onto Youtube! 

Now you can only imagine my reaction when I was told that not only did I have the mispleasure of viewing my not so photographic self, but that everyone on the World Wide Web did too!  And of course, after a fair bit of screaming at him to take them off he duly did, thank goodness.  Nevertheless, it would seem the story doesn’t end there.

Just when I thought I’d saved not just me, but also all of you from my other half’s extraordinary visions of loveliness, he tells me he’s now discovered Pinterest!

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13 responses to “Put The Phone Down…!

  1. Great post, Suzie. I'm like you with computers and phones. Wish you'd let Robert leave the photos on YouTube though – and give us the link, of course 😉

  2. Suzie, your husband must know my husband or perhaps it is a boy thing….they never grow up. My husband loves anything that he can twiddle and press and mess around with. Remember the Casio watches in the 1970's? Not exactly a style icon accessory, but it did lots of things…I am assured telling the time was one of the functions. So I can imagine your horror and you have my sympathy. Not content to invent washing machines with too many buttons and functions and TV sets which need the IQ of Einstein to master, some bright park invented phones which take photos, and YouTube….bad enough as you say, but Pinterest! Lordy, Lordy,you need a huge vino collapso and a wig and false nose….the press will be hounding you soon and the autograph hunters lurking behind bushes…fame is such a drag!. You made me laugh so much, thanks.

  3. So glad you enjoyed it, Jane and that someone can see the funny side, lol. It must, indeed, be a man thing – but hopefully your other half isn't currently putting you through the same thing x

  4. My other half is on the other side of the planet (well nearly) and just because I'm not there, doesn't mean he will curb his gadget mania….I guess I should be glad he has not thought of me and YouTube or Pinterest, but give him time and opportunity….I will let you know. Where do I find this YouTube delight??? Relax, only kidding.

  5. At least I can now console myself in the knowledge that it isn't just me and Robert with distance between us! But be warned, Jane, that doesn't mean you're safe from your other half's gadet mania! Thanks to the internet, he'll find a way… Lol x

  6. Boys and their toys… hee heee! Can't really comment as my OH doesn't do this kind of technology, let alone YouTube, blogging or Twitter. He's more a 'give me a drill and I'll fix you anything' kind of bloke. Love him! Great post, Suzie, although I rather wish you'd left the link…….

  7. Nicky, you lucky thing – a DIY man! Lol… As for the link, I made him delete everything. I couldn't stand the embarrassment.Thanks for stopping by and feel free to drop in again x

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